First Avenger Will Be Last

It’s been a crazy week of rumors. We have the world’s best golfer entangled in a web of hot babes (we should all be so lucky), there are reports of celebrity divorces, and there are even a few rumors bouncing around about celebrities hooking up. Of all these rumors, none of them grabbed my attention more than the rampant speculation about Marvel’s 2011 Captain America film.

We’ve seen this show before. No, not the movie they are going to film, but we’ve seen versions of Captain America played out on film. What? You don’t remember any of them? Don’t worry, neither do the people who actually made them. In fact, I will go on record as saying the Hollywood disaster Battlefield Earth was actually more enjoyable than any Captain film ever made. That’s right, I said it! Marvel, are you listening?

March was the first time I had heard about the project. Professional wrestler John Cena was first asked if he was going to play the lead character. Apparently he is a huge Captain America fan and has said he would be honored to play the title role. Flashbacks of all the other pieces of crap Captain America films I have ever seen in my life quickly flashed before my eyes. Then, a little hope. Cena said he has not been contacted and the rumors are unsubstantiated (much like Cena’s acting career).

HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF.

Wrestler John Cena

As bits of information continue to filter down, I begin to panic again. I’m not a huge Captain fan, but I always feel very strongly that every character (maybe except for Aqua Man) is somebody’s favorite. So, I see my job as making sure these things are done correctly. What did I see as a bad sign? Many, many things.

Direction Please

Let’s start with the choice for director, Joe Johnston. Now, Johnston has had some success in life, but he also has had some real stinkers. He’s directed The Rocketeer (1991), October Sky (1999), and Jumanji (1995). Some will argue Jimanji wasn’t much of a success. I put it in the “I remember liking it, but don’t really remember why I liked it” category. On the down side, he has also given us Honey, I Shrunk The Kids (1989), Jurassic Park III (2001), and the much maligned Hidalgo (2004). If I were really cruel I would mention he worked as a crew member on Howard The Duck (1986). I guess I’m that cruel.

The Rocketeer

Even if this list doesn’t scare you away, all these movies (save for Howard) have a common theme. They were very forgettable films. I liked October Sky, Jumanji, and parts of The Rocketeer. Could I quote you a line from any of them? No. Could I tell you one memorable moment about any of them? No. This is my problem with Johnston as the selection.

Howard the Duck

My second concern about the director is he was the second choice for the project. By all accounts, Jon Favreau was the first choice, but turned it down to do Iron Man instead. What makes me worry about this is that Favreau likely read the script or outline to the movie before turning it down. This is pure conjecture, mind you, but normally directors like to hear a pitch or two about the idea before making up their mind. That’s just red flag number two in my mind.

To Johnston’s credit, we will have a litmus test prior to the filming of Captain. He is the director of The Wolfman, starring Anthony Hopkins and Benicio Del Toro. If that film is good, then I will be convinced he can pull off a big budget portrayal of Captain America. If The Wolfman is underwhelming or slightly above average like his other films, Captain could be in trouble.

Del Toro as The Wolfman

Writing Is Key

I’m both skeptical and excited about the writers for this project. Marvel has hired the team of Stephen McFeely and Christopher Markus. They are the duo who brought us the first (and currently filming the second) Chronicles of Narnia movies and they wrote a gem of a film called You Kill Me, starring Ben Kingsley. I liked both of these films. I especially thought You Kill Me was an extremely clever script. I recommended it to a lot of people.

So what is my problem with this team? They have a serious lack of experience. These are the only items on their movie resume. That’s it. Three films total by the time Captain comes out. My hope is that it won’t matter. My hope is that they have fresh ideas and will churn out a script just as imaginative as Narnia and just as whip-snap clever as You Kill Me. Now, if only I had faith in Johnston to absorb such a script and do it justice. (Fingers crossed).

Ben Kingsley & Téa Leoni in You Kill Me

Casting Issues

As always the Internet is buzzing with rumors of who will be cast as Captain America himself. Now that Cena appears to be staying in the squared circle of pro wrestling, much fodder and guessing has taken place. The short list of actors has been pretty consistent on various entertainment websites. It breaks down to these choices: Leonardo DiCaprio, Matthew McConaughey, Will Smith, and the all-of-a-sudden-can’t-miss-kid Sam Worhtington. Yes, the same Sam Worhtington I wrote about last week. I would love to be this kid’s agent. He is slated to do like 10 films in two years. Can a brother get a vacation please?

I said my peace on Smith. I thought he would be an excellent choice for Green Lantern. If they do choose him, I think it would be an interesting tip of the hat to the origin of Captain America’s story. Do you remember Isaiah Bradley? He was a black test subject used by the government to recreate the super soldier serum first used on the original Captain America. This could be an interesting choice if they decide to go this way.

Mathew McConaughey

McConaughey has surprised me many times in his acting career. He pulled off roles I didn’t think suited him. This time, however, I think I wouldn’t be too judgmental in pointing out McConaughey’s very thick accent that seems to work its way into every film he does. I can’t picture Captain with a southern drawl. Sorry, but it’s just me. Also, he’s WAY too polished. I want my Captain America to look tough, buff, and ready to kick ass.

Leo is an interesting choice. I somehow can’t picture him as an action hero. I always see him in more dramatic, high tense situations. He’s a great actor in my opinion, but not sure if he’d be a good fit for Captain America.

Leonardo DiCaprio

Final Thoughts

Two final worries about this film have to do with its name and the lack of information. It is the last of the Avengers movies to hit the screen, but the name of the film is The First Avenger: Captain America. I hope it is just clever marketing to lead into the Avengers movie. Perhaps that is all it is, but I can’t help but wonder how confusing this may be for movie goers. They didn’t call Iron Man the second Avenger nor did the call The Hulk the next to last avenger. I just don’t see the purpose for the long title.

My final worry is we don’t seem to know anything about the film as of yet. It comes out just a few months after Thor and they seem to have Thor fully cast down to the key grip and best boy. Captain, however, hasn’t even decided who will play the lead role. This makes me wonder if they are waiting to see if an actor’s schedule will clear up or if they simply can’t decide who should play the role. Either way, Marvel should’ve had something to give to fans by now.

I will cross my fingers on this one. I hope Captain America will live up to its long anticipation. If not, don’t say I didn’t warn you.